Shantae: Risky Waters

A mistake on Shantae's part causes Bolo to be captured by Scuttle Town's most frequent pest, Risky Boots. This is a problem for both hero and villain, as Bolo really has the hots for Risky, while Risky finds him annoying as ****. Does Bolo even want to be saved by Shantae? Find out in "Shantae: Risky Waters"!
~Original description for the prologue of the unfinished first draft, January 13 2010

http://sonicstarvocaloid.deviantart.com/gallery/24202177
http://sonicstarvocaloid.deviantart.com/gallery/37623372

This fanfic was done just after "Risky's Revenge" was revealed back in 2009, in celebration of the then-unreleased DSi sequel.

Looking back on it though, yeah, it's rather rocky. Everything moved too quickly to comprehend, and my fan character, Synder, came off as flat. Because of this, I've scrapped the "first draft" and have started to work on the second.

I'd really like some help on this rewrite, though. So what can I do to improve this story? How can Synder develop herself throughout? Anything that might help this story out, I'm totally open for!

Funny, I had the idea in my head of Bolo getting captured as well. Not necessarily by Risky, I just thought it'd be a funny concept for Shantae and friends to have to go and save Bolo. Also, I like the title, which was supposed to be the title of their GCN Shantae game if it ever made it any farther than the GBA game did.

Your links do not seem to work.

Axol The Axolotl wrote:Your links do not seem to work.

Yeah...I deleted all the chapters I did some time ago. I wasn't really happy with how it turned out. ^^;

Don't secede the first time.
Try again!

Axol The Axolotl wrote:Don't secede the first time.
Try again!

Thanks, Axol. ^-^

Yeah, you can always try again. ^^ That's how anything I've ever written got done, dropping it for a while until some new ideas came in to make the story explode to life. > : D

Just save that oc of yours for another fanfic.